
Schmidt is likely: D**n it! I can’t find my driving moccasins anywhere.

Winston’s acute observations: Nick announced that they were going to Best Buy for Black Friday.

When Schmidt delivered the hard truth: Bathtubs are medieval filth cauldrons. I’m not interested.

When Jess tried to negotiate a deal: Jess was dealing with a pawn shop owner and said, “$550 for the TV? Seems a little steep.

Schmidt’s thoughts on aging: Old people freak me out. With their hands and their legs.

Jess’ big night: After Nick tells Jess he thought he heard a couple of bums fighting outside.

When Schmidt described his sex life: I’m like a sexual snowflake.

An intense moment of honesty: Nick and Jess have had so many moments of honesty along the way.

Schmidt is the only person: Can someone please get my towel? It’s in my room next to my Irish walking cape.

When Winston got biblical: The guys got lost in the desert and he told Nick, “I’m worried about Schmidt.

Schmidt was funny even at his lowest: I’m a mess, I can’t sleep, I urinate constantly. I cried the other day listening to a techno song.

When Schmidt answered: “I know what you’re thinking and the answer is yes, I have been able to reach completion.

Schmidt’s take on the most: I don’t celebrate Christmas, okay? Or as I like to call it.

When Winston nailed his job interview: I know Word. And I can open a document. Save it. Save AS. Print.